foozle vt foo-zled; foo-zling (1892): to manage or play awkwardly; a bungling golf stroke

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

The Colored Golf Glove

Whatever happened to the colored golf glove? And by colored I mean non-white. You see pairs of rain gloves and cold weather gloves for sale in black but other than that I don't see anything that isn't white. Even some six or seven years ago when I started getting interested in the game you could buy a dark green or navy blue footjoy glove. Good luck finding one of those now. Do old ladies still have a secret pipeline to soft pastel-colored golf gloves? I hope so for their sakes, and for the sakes of their outfits. Footjoy's SciFlex glove was available last year with some interesting accent colors but still the majority of the glove was white. And I've noticed a lot of the major retail outlets have those color-splashed gloves on close-out, making me think even their days are numbered. Come on, manufacturer's--give us some variety when shopping for gloves, would ya please?

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

What's Left To Blog About?

Spring officially starts on Thursday and the snow here should be gone by the end of next week. The ground will be sloppy but golf courses will be opening in my neck of the woods before I know it and I couldn't be more excited. Am I ready to play? You bet I am. I've got a new driver and a new putter and I've been working on my swing all winter. I've got a couple of new shirts and enough new golf balls to last me until at least May. I've got a new attitude and a new outlook on the game--its to be happy with the golf life I got. The only thing left to do is take it to the course.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Thank You

Thank you, Sean O'Hair, for heeding my call last week for someone other than Billy Mayfair to win the PODS Championship. I know you didn't do it just for me but I thank you as if you did anyway. I'll continue to root for you like you are my older brother that I never met (or something like that) and wish you the best in your future golfing endeavors.

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Billy Mayfair

Watching this guy putt is painful. I can't believe he ever finished number two on the PGA Tour money list (like he did in 1995, behind only Greg Norman) with a putting stroke so awful. He used to cut across the ball with a regular-length putter and traditional grip and that was bad enough. Now he's using a long putter (or broom) yet he's anchoring it in his chest like a mid-length putter and gripping it like one too. What an abomination! If he wins the PODS Championship today I will be shocked. Please Geoff Ogilvy or Brandt Snedeker or anyone, save us from having to watch this guy putt all day long. I'm begging you.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Slow Play

We all agree that slow play is a serious problem with golfers today. Can we also agree that we've never met anyone who would ever agree that they are part of the slow play problem? If its always "somebody else's fault" that your round took five hours don't we have an even bigger problem on our hands? Like one of honesty and responsibility? If its always the group in front of you that's holding you up, have you ever thought that it was the group in front of them that was actually the problem? Or that maybe the group behind yours is thinking the same thing about your group? Speed up, people--don't let your ineptitude on the golf course ruin somebody else's "walk in the park."

Monday, March 3, 2008

Golfers Need An Off-season

The only good thing about being a die-hard golfer in a cold-weather place like Minnesota is that you have enough time away from the game to forget how disappointingly average at it you really are. Yes, you have just enough distance between your last tee time and your next one to delude yourself into thinking you are a considerably better golfer then you really are and that can be fun, if you're into that sort of thing. The Spring thaw brings with it a new season of golf (which is nice) but it also ushers in the harsh realities of how crooked and short your drives are, how inaccurate and unpredictable your iron shots are, how much more your touch around the greens resembles that of a rapist and not a pickpocket, and how achingly difficult putting can be when you're always 20-plus feet away from the hole. Sad but true--winter isn't always the worst season in which to find yourself if you are crazy about playing golf.

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Luke Donald vs. The Bear Trap

I know I'm on record as saying Steve Elkington has the prettiest golf swing I've ever seen but after watching Luke Donald today at the Honda Classic I'm starting to think there's a serious contender to Mr. Elkington's throne. This guy is classic and perfect every step of the way and I could waste hours of my time just watching him hit golf balls. Sounds weird, I know, but it's the truth. On the contrary, though, NBC is playing up this damn Bear Trap at PGA National so much that I'm not sure I can stand to watch three more hours of their coverage tomorrow. A par three with water in front followed by a par four with water all around and then, gasp, another par three with water in front of the green. Sounds brutal, I know. Brutal enough to have a silly name like "The Bear Trap"? Of that I can't be sure--all I can tell you is that I'm sick of hearing about it.