foozle vt foo-zled; foo-zling (1892): to manage or play awkwardly; a bungling golf stroke

Sunday, January 31, 2010

The PGA Tour Is In Trouble


The first three full-field events of the 2010 PGA Tour season have seen Ryan Palmer, Bill Haas and Ben Crane in their respective winner's circles. I don't think I'm alone when I say I think the Tour will die a slow death if this keeps up. And I don't mean any disrespect to those aforementioned gentlemen, I assure you. I couldn't pick Ryan Palmer out of a line-up and I'm a big-time fan of (televised) professional golf. Bill Haas has a semi-famous dad, sure, but he's done nothing up until this point in his career to validate his lineage. And Ben Crane? This guy's famous for playing really, really, really slowly and nothing else. The Tour needs Tiger Woods, and if he still can't figure out how to keep his tiger in his pants, then Phil Mickelson needs to pull his head out of his you-know-what and seize the opportunity Tiger's infidelity has afforded him. Please, for the love of God, I can't watch another tournament with a Johnny Nobody holding off a bunch of other Johnny Nobodys down the stretch on the back nine on Sunday. It's just not gonna happen, I'm sorry to say.

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